Seven
Normalcy

Warm sunlight was burning through my eyelids.  Whatever state of hibernation I had been lying in was suddenly cut short by a persistent feeling of discomfort.  I forced my eyes open and squinted into a blindingly bright room.  Dull pain throbbed through various appendages as I gingerly attempted movement.  Turning my head I found myself staring across a glass-topped coffee table toward a familiar beige carpeted staircase.

I’m on my couch, I concluded with relief, briefly recalling a half a dozen worse places in the past I’d been surprised to find myself waking up in.

Twisting sideways and blinking heavily, I attempted to sit upright.  My back hurt.  My legs hurt.  All my muscles were screaming for me to leave them alone and let them sit idle for a bit longer.

Did I get drunk last night or..?

Specks of dried bird-gore dotting beat up khakis reminded me of the insanity I’d recently dealt with.  I groaned and held my head in my hands, momentarily concerned about the fact that I kept forgetting things every time I woke up.  My brain pulsed with pain, but not just the hangover-induced type.  Instead it seemed to be layered with a disturbing new sensation.  Almost as if someone had stuck a straw in my skull and sucked out all the nutrients or... whatever it was that made a brain feel like a well oiled machine.  My mind felt... dry.  Rusty.  Combined with what was shaping up to be a throbbing migraine, I was fairly certain it was the worst I’d felt in a long time. 

Hangover to the nth degree, I thought.

“Fuck me...”

Questions started to bubble up to the surface of my consciousness.  Questions like: Where did Aerin go?  And am I safe right now?  And holy shit where did I get that big fucking bump on the back of my head?

I pushed up off the couch on stiff legs and immediately discovered that the speed of my movement was seriously hindered by how bad my head was throbbing.  Seconds later as the dizziness was passing my ear caught a high-pitched metallic jingling that immediately evoked a spark of fear in the pit of my stomach.  The handle to the front door was being shaken.  Something was trying to get in.

Fuck!  Its back!  I thought, followed immediately by: ouch, ouch... aaah my fucking head, as I jogged silently over to hide around the corner. 

I crouched down and steadied myself, trying not to move in the lame hopes that the returning baddie might detect no sign of human occupancy and conclude I’d fled, or maybe died or... something.  The door pushed open making a terrible wood-crunching sound like it wasn’t quite functioning the way it was supposed to.  I strained to hear something over the pulsing boom in my head.   There was a crinkling artificial sound, and then... the unmistakable sound of heels clicking on my linoleum floor.  I almost fell around the corner standing back up.

“Hey, I’m glad you’re up.  I was starting to get worried.”  The Witch had a handful of grocery bags in one hand and a small pizza box balanced on the other as she gave me a quizzical look, “Were you just on the floor?”

“Uh...no...  I mean, yeah.  I thought that the... umm... thing came back.”

She dropped the bags and proceeded to open up my fridge and cabinets, then started unpacking items.  I stood staring at her.  She was acting so... casual.  Like nothing had even happened the prior night.  No crazy look in her eyes like I knew must have been glaring out of mine.  No startled disbelief that we were the targets of some inter-dimensional assassination attempt mere hours ago. 

She’s just putting fucking groceries away.  What the hell? 

“So Aerin...” I gently eased myself down at the kitchen table, hoping that staying put in one spot for awhile might ease the head-ache.  “What exactly happened last night?  I though I saw you standing between me and that thing and then- oh man, is that what I think it is?”

She turned and gave a quick smile as I started pawing at the pizza box where an intoxicating and familiar odor was wafting from.

“Portland Pie, sweetheart.  You need to eat.  Sorry, I didn’t have money for a large.”

I suddenly realized how hungry I actually was as the box revealed the glorious sight of a buffalo chicken pizza.

“Damn, I am starved right now... you rock... thanks.”

I stuffed my face in silence for a few minutes and soon began to feel much less like the mindless zombie that rolled off the couch.

“What time is it?” I asked between mouthfuls.

“You can have that whole thing, I ate sushi already.  It’s about three-thirty in the afternoon.”

The pounding in my head started to subside as I watched her putter around the kitchen.  She had picked up some basics for me: water, a bottle of Aleve, a few microwaveable meals, crackers, a six pack of beer, and some assorted odds and ends that I couldn’t quite place.  They looked like small bottles of spices and dried up vegetables.  Beyond the startling normalcy of putting groceries away though things still felt wildly off.  In addition to stocking me up with supplies, something she had never done when we were dating, the Witch seemed overly alert.  Her eyes kept darting to the windows every few minutes.  And she had kept her coat on.  A sure sign, I knew from past experience, that she was not comfortable where she was.

“So,” I said casually as I gulped my last few bites down, “if that thing shows up again, should I call you or... just start chanting?”

She moved over the table and idly picked at a leftover piece of pizza, talking an unusually long time to examine a piece of chicken before popping it into her mouth. 

Oh for Christ’s sake... quit drawing it out, woman. 

Even in times of minor crisis she still couldn’t resist a dramatic pause.

“Yeah, I don’t really think you’ll be seeing that thing for quite some time,” she said with an obvious sense of satisfaction.

“You sound pretty sure of yourself...”

“I should be.  I’m the reason it left the house and got stuck outside in the first place.”

Attempting to play by her rules and keep my cool, I moved to the kitchen counter and filled a clean looking glass that was sitting along the edge of the sink with water, trying to process what she’d just said.  She was certainly tapped into things I never had been, I’d known that since we met.  But an intimidating force in the face of a supernatural attacker just seemed a tad far fetched.

But then again, I thought as the clear liquid cooled my throat, what doesn’t about all this stuff?

“So you’re saying this thing, whatever the hell it is, was scared of you?” I threw her a skeptical look while moving back to the table.

“Not scared.  It was a negative energy draw.  Sorta like rip in our plane.”

I looked blankly at her, giving her my best I’m-trying-to-follow-you face.

“Okay,” she sighed, “basically that thing filters out all the good around it and exists purely in the nastiness left over.  Me doing what I do, I’m a positive energy conduit...”

“I see.”

“You’re... not really following me are you?”

“Not in the least bit,” I said, trying not to sound irritated about the fact that I was feeling like a complete simpleton.

She sighed turned around, looking around the room like there was a chart up somewhere that was going to break it all down for me.  A moment later she spun around and held her hands up, moving them back and forth toward and away each other. 

“Think of it this way; we’re like the same sides of a magnet.”

“You stick to each other?”

“...No.  Jay... the same sides, so we repel each other.  It couldn’t come near my side without some serious explodie stuff happening.  So I... let it happen.  My side of the magnet repelled the other, and it went away.  For now at least.”

“Uh-huh...  Well, that’s all good I guess.  But... uh... not to be a ‘glass is half empty’ kind of guy, but that would implying I will be seeing it again at some point?”

The Witch moved back toward the kitchen table and sat down across from me looking anxious.  I could tell from her demeanor she was done explaining things.

“Listen, there’s a sheet of paper with some instructions on it there on the counter.  If something should happen there are some steps you can take that’ll help keep you safe.  Keep it with you if you leave, okay?”

For what, how to sound like a choir of women chanting and drive off a walking glow-stick trying to force entry into my house? 

“Are you kidding me, Aerin?”

“No,” she didn’t miss a beat, “I cleansed the house and you’ll be alright here temporarily, but be very careful if you go anywhere.”

“This is fucking nuts.  I’ve gotta go to work at some point.  My life isn’t exactly overflowing with job opportunities lately.”

“I know.  Just... be careful.  Be smart.  I know you’re intuitive.  But for the time being... just follow the instructions if anything happens.” 

I realized she was starting to gather herself for departure.